What Do You Value More Than Your Child's Safety?

 "It is like sitting on a cliff. For parents, it revolves around the central question: Am I doing the right thing? What is the right thing for you when the ground is a long way down or shifting under you constantly."                                                                  "It's exhausting, and I think it is increasing stress and anxiety and the mental fatigue that we experience when we have to deal with life-critical things and don't have a solid, consistent basis on which to make decisions."                            "There's no black and white. It's this pendulum that swings between risk and benefit and it has to be a calculated trade-off."                                                    Dr.Judy Illes, Canada Research Chair, neuroethics, University of British Columbia

"[Children remain] remarkably unimpacted by COVID-19. [There is no evidence kids are epidemiologically important in community transmission]."                      "The stereotype that children are just germspreading machines goes back to influenza, but we know now that COVID-19 is very different than influenza when it comes to kids."                                                                                           Dr.Michael Silverman, chief, division of infectious diseases, Schulich School of Medicine & Dentistry, Western University

"Children may therefore have the potential to be substantial drivers of the pandemic. [While the first early reports out of China failed to find children being major vectors, school closures early in the pandemic] thwarted larger-scale investigations of schools as a source of community transmission."                   "[While children experience much less severe illness from the virus] there is no reason to think that children are less likely to transmit the virus than adults."  Dr.Zoe Hyde, University of Western Australia

A custodian cleans a classroom in March after the pandemic hit. School will look differently when students return in the fall. In Ontario, there will only be 15 students in a classroom at one time in schools that have to have an 'adaptive model.' (Jonathan Hayward/Canadian Press)

Confused yet? Contrasting impressions, don't know which might be correct? That's the impression frustrated parents have, casting about for definite answers to tremulous questions over whether they should be sending their children back to school in September or committing to home schooling them and in the process sacrificing their professional lives. Balancing the important things of life; your offspring as opposed to your ambitions.

People, particularly parents of young children, are experiencing restless nights. Accompanied by strange dreams where shape-shifting and puzzling backgrounds, frightful occurrences and inexplicable conclusions come to them during their fitful episodes of sleep sandwiched between wide-awake struggles to return to sleep. Night-time, when we are at our most vulnerable, assailed by troubling and fearful thoughts of events overtaking us, making us helpless to decide our own futures with any degree of confidence.

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Across Quebec and Ontario parents are petitioning for smaller class sizes. Some teachers admit going back into a classroom terrifies them. "Is it safe to send my child back to school?", parents everywhere that the global pandemic has struck -- and that's everywhere -- ponder, frustrated at the information coming their way, that seems to change from day to day. Dr.Judy Illes and UBC neurology resident Dr.Chris Feehan are of the opinion that as the stress inherent in awaiting the next pandemic surges, preparing for the unknown may trigger pre-traumatic stress.

This syndrome is not yet included in the official manual of mental illnesses, but in all likelihood, it is destined to be, "as the body reacts to perceived future dangers", the two wrote. "Real or imagined, these dangers activate the nervous system in preparation for a burst of activity potentially necessary for survival", they wrote, "And not knowing what that act will entail, or when." Though their focus was on front line health workers, it applies as well to parents "and just about everyone else who is confused about the fall, and waiting for the next shoe to drop."

The latest federal modelling of the near future in Canada was released just days earlier, including a "reasonable worst-case scenario" represented by a large fall peak of COVID cases, followed by additional peaks and valleys. Even while numbers of new reported cases daily is on the increase, with schools soon to reopen "everyone is on nerve", according to Montreal cardiologist and epidemiologist Dr.Christopher Labos. Mindful that the combined topic of children's well-being, and COVID-19 has now found common agreement.

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A paper published in JAMA Pediatrics found the amount of viral RNA (genetic pieces of the virus) detected in nose swabs of children between the ages of five to 17 turned out to be similar to those taken from adults. Children under age five showed viral levels ten to 100 times higher. Even though children have experienced less severe illness by far from the virus "there is no reason to think that children are less likely to transmit the virus than adults", pointed out Dr.Hyde.

Whose conclusion was challenged by the publication a day later by Dr.Silverman's opposite conclusion. "Part of the energy that is surrounding current protests is about getting out of the house, getting together, screaming together", noted Dr.Illes in another emerging phenomenon she has named anticipatory fatigue; a reflection of the fatigue associated with the unknown. It's difficult to be strategic, she points out, given that the science continues to move, leaving society with a scattershot approach to the future mired in the novel coronavirus.

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Some studies leave the impression that children who are kept at home develop a higher risk of anxiety and depression. Perhaps sensitive children subconsciously adopt those attitudes because it's what they sense emanates from their parents. A young nuclear family with two professionals desperate to find some quiet time sequestered at home with their offspring who begin to imagine that having their children attend school part time may afford them some badly needed relief and time to themselves.

"Think about what's important to you. What you value", urges Dr. Illes. Negative thoughts of the future can be turned into positive ones when they're reframed to reflect variant scenarios. Focus on evidence-based information. Take care not to consume too much alcohol, or engaging in other unhealthy coping devices, and focus on recognizing symptoms such as constant, vivid concerns and disturbed sleep.

Elementary School students in the U.S. social distance as they line up after leaving the restroom on their first day back to school Monday, July 27, 2020 in Corinth, Miss. Many Canadian students will be returning to classrooms in September as provinces announce school reopening plans. (Adam Robison/The Northeast Mississippi Daily Journal via AP)