Will Someone Rid Us Of This....

"I'm not stepping aside. I'm running in the next election. Everything is going fine.
"This city is in better shape than it was two years ago."
Toronto Mayor Rob Ford

"A premier that is unelected, criticizing a mayor who was elected by the greatest number of people in history. It is easy for the previous premier [Dalton McGuinty] to just get up and leave. We haven't quit. Get your own house in order before you say anything about the mayor."
Councillor Doug Ford

 

 

City Hall security has addressed the distressing conditions under which the good mayor must now seek to perform his duties. He is hounded daily, by the hour, the minute, each time he appears in public, by reporters eager to hear the clarifying statements that fall from his lips as he discloses the truth and nothing but the truth to the damnable lies circulating about his purported drug habit. Velvet ropes have been set up to clear a pathway from the elevator to the door of the mayor's office.

 

No word yet whether a red carpet has also been laid down to guide and pamper his injured sensitivities, but right royal treatment has been put on to sooth the beast, regardless. As for the video that never was, someone in the Mayor's office has stated that the story about its whereabouts, known to the Mayor's office, emanated from Mr. Towhey, his fired former chief of staff who had the temerity to recommend to Mayor Ford that addiction amelioration services would do him a world of good.

"He's got an axe to grind with the mayor here and with other people in the office. Certainly with Councillor Ford. He's trying to blame everyone else for where he is", said the source. Where he is, of course, is without employment. Just reward for doing his job, being concerned over the welfare of the man he once served. His error being in that he observed and drew conclusions and then stated his opinion; bad form.

But he has company. The Mayor's policy adviser and his assistant and now the Mayor's executive assistant are all in the position of seeking satisfying, meaningful, and well remunerated employment. Their curriculum vitae no doubt look good; they've experienced much in their professional lives, culminating in the challenge of representing a man elected to further advance the social welfare of a great city now in a jumble of confusion about what/why/who they elected to the office of mayor.

For his part, the mayor generously invites all those in his employ to "pursue new opportunities when they arise."