Trusting Neighbours

For the most part we like our neighbours; they're fairly decent people, personable, nice to speak with, good to know. We like passing the time of day with them. Most of them, that is; there are some exceptions, aren't there always? But they're neighbours, you've got to get along, otherwise life can become rather more complicated than it should. No one vets the neighbours before moving into a neighbourhood; ya takes what ya gets.

It's like Canada and the United States, the wealthy neighbour living in the big house with a grand lifestyle, and a worldwide reputation - for all kinds of things, but highly respected for all that. And us, the guys next door living in more modest accommodation, with a lifestyle paralleling the other, but not quite there yet. We share a continent, a language, some values, but remain a trifle testy about our differences.

Still, we've always celebrated the fact that we have been amicable neighbours for the most part, the occasional spat aside. The longest undefended border in the world, we always like to trumpet. Why defend that border, after all? Our relations have been sufficiently fluid to allow citizens of one to pass seamlessly as visitors from one to the other. There are a whole lot of Canadians choosing to live as expatriats in the U.S. and a lesser number of Americans choosing to live as exiles in Canada.

We enjoy good political ties, fairly nice trading opportunities (lies and damn lies, but that's a whole other story, and not a very nice one at that), and Canadians are more than a little familiar with the United States as a holiday destination - while, sigh, Americans persist in thinking of Canadians as that boring bunch always crapping on the U.S. Right!

Ah, but matters have been slowly but inexorably turned on their heads. Canadians are getting their comeuppance. The first thing the Americans want us to know and to digest fully is that Canadians are not Americans. We thought we already knew that and even celebrated it, but Americans tend to feel we aren't sufficiently aware of it, and to that end they have instituted some formal niceties (for them; irritants for us).

Henceforth, birth certificates will no longer suffice. Canadians wishing to visit the United States must have a valid passport. The easeful border crossing of yesteryear is no more. Even with said passport expect some occasional gruelling, even rude questioning. Hey, good and ample reason to stay home. So stay home, already.

Wait, we're not finished...! Now the U.S. Department of Homeland Security will patrol the Canada-U.S. border using unmanned aerial drones by the end of 2007. This programme has already successfully passed its infancy, and is ready for full implementation. The U.S. government has invested nearly $100M (US) for drones to monitor the northern and southern borders.

Furthermore, satellite infrastructure to expand the drones' reach across said borders has been announced. In September officials of Homeland Security unveiled plans for an array of sensors, infrared cameras, watchtowers and drones to eventually cover the entire 8,890-kilometre border with Canada. The border will be under complete surveillance within 3 to 6 years.

It's to keep all of us al-Qaeda types at home. Okay, I'm convinced.