Order It Up!

"I've become more and more convinced that we know who we're speaking for and we know who we're speaking to." Liberal Leader Michael Ignatieff

Who might that be other than the great unwashed electorate, breathless with expectation that Liberal leader of the Official Opposition has finally matured into a statesmanlike politician, primed and prepared to lead the sickly Liberal party out of the hinterland wilderness to which they consigned themselves through outright illiberal, porkpie politics?

He's had his confidence renewed, he's chewing at the bit, stamping furiously to get on with it, and demonstrate clearly to the electorate that he's their man. The Liberal Express has taken him to all ten provinces and three territories and he's stumped and stewed and promised and pursued. He's ready! Are we?

Can hardly wait. He has pledged to tell the truth and nothing but the truth. A refreshing challenge for any politician. No more hedging about? Nope, he's ready to tell anyone who will listen and even those who won't, that we're harbouring in the highest office of the land, an incompetent, a raw upstart who doesn't know up from down.

This Conservative-led government has brought the country to the brink of economic disaster, lost vital heartland employment through its lax attention to the needs of the country. It has caused Canadians no end of headaches by not competently catering to Quebec, and it has darkened Canada's international reputation by its moral choices.

Under the Liberals, led by His Truly on the other hand, Utopia beckons. Are we ready for it? Are we deserving of it? So close, yet so far. Far, because the right party for the right job is languishing in obscurity, close because the electorate has the super-terrific choice of getting it right, this time around. Kick the bums out!

Bring the natural ruling party back to where it rightfully belongs. Do that, and Canadians will be guaranteed university and college education for every deserving aspirant: "If you get the grades, you get to go", crowed Iggy. Universal health care problems will be wrestled to the ground and spring up again, solved, ta-dum!

(You're so dumb you probably think that health and education and child-care a provincial problems, right? Shame, shame on you!)

Access to reasonable and reliable child care? No problem, the Liberals have the answers. And psst! Guaranteed retirement security? Sound good? You bet! Feel like accessing all of that? No sweat. You know those paper thingees you get at polling booths. Called ballots? Yep, that's the ticket!

Just do it!